The Freelance Mentalists.
Sunday, February 11, 2024
More Country etc. From 2004
For my debut as regular, a garrulosity incited by video of Big & Rich's "Save A Horse, Ride A Cowboy":
At the very dawn of country video, country midgets were there (On TNN, long before CMT.) Just one example: the country Osmonds encountered a malevolent munchkin in an homage to TROUBLE IN TINY TOWN. In post-Donny solidarity, they collectively kicked the (Mormon for caffeine-free"fudge") out of(a dummy, I hope)(Come to think it, when they then picked flogged it with a hitching post, must've been to reassure us that it *was* a dummy, I realize now!) The very best current use of country midgets, however, is actually in the video of D12's "My Band," or whatever it's called: one of the D12, the fattest one, is trying to come up with a side project that will get him out of "lead singer" Em's shadow,so he waddles onstage to lasso an audience gal and, crucially, he's got this *cowboy midget sidekick* whose own valiant strivings both parody and further humanize Fatboy's own, for all yall weightists out there. (Not unlike Sancho Panza's cruciality to bear, dang it.) Also a great poke at Em's non-rival Kid Rock, see like the cowboy midget is like Joe C.(RIP), and Kid Rock's good ol boy defensive water-treading is getting as tired as Cowfatboys's rope. (Although he and sideorder do get the girl, who looks deelited to be in their loops, just like Kid got the country-therefore-mainly-female-customer hits-of-migraine-sunshine hit duet with Sheryl.Back to Big & Rich, but also a digression: All of the outcropping of country rap 'llowed on the radio so far have been comedy, or presented as such. (Although Toby's "How Do You Like Me Now?" was always convincingly life-as-revenge, even before his red white & blue 'tude provided kickin' hindsight.)Wil there be a true country G-thang one day, will Buck 65 or Haystak or Toby bring it? You know the latter will prob feel the need to top himself by describing Osama's head on a platta, right about the time it just won't matter, one way or t'other. The Grandaddy of country rap per se might actually be early 70s AM Top 40's Jim Stafford, who got to growl "Don't come back to Hattie's shack," and also bout what's hanging on her smokehouse wall. But only after more *comedy*-guise cruises like "Spiders and Snakes" and "Wildwood Weed" so there's yer precedent right off. But anyway Big & Rich don't even need to talk G. cos they're creepy enough even being funny, like TK's HDYLMN?" Not because of their resident littleperson, but there's this blowup doll that keeps falling into the rapper's lap. They're in the backseat, but going over the Tallahatchee Bridge in noon traffic, not too romantic, and he keeps having to put the dark red pageboy wig back on her barepate even before raising her from the other headspace, *plus* he's gotta keep on lipsynching. (Which is my motto too.) The creepy part, though is that I'm not sure if or when a real(live) actress is edited stand-in or rather fall-in for doll.Either way, the rapper's forever and ever trying to keep (whichever)baldie decently re-re-re-wigged. The last shot is a big closeup of the doll/actress:Pretty!(Got the wig on.) Then: her eyes move.*Zoom.* Zoom.* Oh. Mama. Only thing even not-very-close to this is SheDaisy riding around the desert in a van, picking up hunks and rhapsodizing about "love in the passenger seat." (Chuck Eddy replies:Wait, that's not the rapper in the backseat with the doll, is it??? It's Big. I mean Rich. One of them...<<) Well Mr. City Entry whut makes you thank B&R can't do they own rappin eh. Furthermore, I just saw SheDaisy's "Passenger Seat"(tunefully fresh as Mary Hopkin and ABBA and Shania used to be), and hang if there aint a midget in *that,* so we still on track. (Okay, so he's a dwarf and they usually are in vids; I do my own stereo-slur blur like Yanke.E just done.) SheDaisy's Tushwagon is also on track: non-stereo-but-actually archetype 1972 AM Top 40 Volkswagen Bus mit Peace Sign mural and Quaaludes (ask your Momma) and the foxy Frenchy "Daisy (sharp-featured brunette under well-set Kangol) is surrounded by Mo'roccan swirls even Al-Allakim Brian Jones might approve and the whole situation remiinds me of thees two girls *kept* giving me a ride when I was hitching to school and even though this was common enough in '72 or rather *because* it was so taken for granted, started to bother me especially that they would just like that pick up someone with my horsehair and finally I mentioned this and strawberry blonde Bonnie says "Oh, we're ready!" and shows me how this six-shooter is stashed under Mary Tyler-looking Sue's driver's seat. So maybe SheDaisy's ditto as they follow hunks on Hondas off road to a carnival nestled in the arroyos and that's when they meet the buff dwarf fire eater.(Speaking of horsehair.)
¶ 2/11/2024 0 comments
At the very dawn of country video, country midgets were there (On TNN, long before CMT.) Just one example: the country Osmonds encountered a malevolent munchkin in an homage to TROUBLE IN TINY TOWN. In post-Donny solidarity, they collectively kicked the (Mormon for caffeine-free"fudge") out of(a dummy, I hope)(Come to think it, when they then picked flogged it with a hitching post, must've been to reassure us that it *was* a dummy, I realize now!) The very best current use of country midgets, however, is actually in the video of D12's "My Band," or whatever it's called: one of the D12, the fattest one, is trying to come up with a side project that will get him out of "lead singer" Em's shadow,so he waddles onstage to lasso an audience gal and, crucially, he's got this *cowboy midget sidekick* whose own valiant strivings both parody and further humanize Fatboy's own, for all yall weightists out there. (Not unlike Sancho Panza's cruciality to bear, dang it.) Also a great poke at Em's non-rival Kid Rock, see like the cowboy midget is like Joe C.(RIP), and Kid Rock's good ol boy defensive water-treading is getting as tired as Cowfatboys's rope. (Although he and sideorder do get the girl, who looks deelited to be in their loops, just like Kid got the country-therefore-mainly-female-customer hits-of-migraine-sunshine hit duet with Sheryl.Back to Big & Rich, but also a digression: All of the outcropping of country rap 'llowed on the radio so far have been comedy, or presented as such. (Although Toby's "How Do You Like Me Now?" was always convincingly life-as-revenge, even before his red white & blue 'tude provided kickin' hindsight.)Wil there be a true country G-thang one day, will Buck 65 or Haystak or Toby bring it? You know the latter will prob feel the need to top himself by describing Osama's head on a platta, right about the time it just won't matter, one way or t'other. The Grandaddy of country rap per se might actually be early 70s AM Top 40's Jim Stafford, who got to growl "Don't come back to Hattie's shack," and also bout what's hanging on her smokehouse wall. But only after more *comedy*-guise cruises like "Spiders and Snakes" and "Wildwood Weed" so there's yer precedent right off. But anyway Big & Rich don't even need to talk G. cos they're creepy enough even being funny, like TK's HDYLMN?" Not because of their resident littleperson, but there's this blowup doll that keeps falling into the rapper's lap. They're in the backseat, but going over the Tallahatchee Bridge in noon traffic, not too romantic, and he keeps having to put the dark red pageboy wig back on her barepate even before raising her from the other headspace, *plus* he's gotta keep on lipsynching. (Which is my motto too.) The creepy part, though is that I'm not sure if or when a real(live) actress is edited stand-in or rather fall-in for doll.Either way, the rapper's forever and ever trying to keep (whichever)baldie decently re-re-re-wigged. The last shot is a big closeup of the doll/actress:Pretty!(Got the wig on.) Then: her eyes move.*Zoom.* Zoom.* Oh. Mama. Only thing even not-very-close to this is SheDaisy riding around the desert in a van, picking up hunks and rhapsodizing about "love in the passenger seat." (Chuck Eddy replies:Wait, that's not the rapper in the backseat with the doll, is it??? It's Big. I mean Rich. One of them...<<) Well Mr. City Entry whut makes you thank B&R can't do they own rappin eh. Furthermore, I just saw SheDaisy's "Passenger Seat"(tunefully fresh as Mary Hopkin and ABBA and Shania used to be), and hang if there aint a midget in *that,* so we still on track. (Okay, so he's a dwarf and they usually are in vids; I do my own stereo-slur blur like Yanke.E just done.) SheDaisy's Tushwagon is also on track: non-stereo-but-actually archetype 1972 AM Top 40 Volkswagen Bus mit Peace Sign mural and Quaaludes (ask your Momma) and the foxy Frenchy "Daisy (sharp-featured brunette under well-set Kangol) is surrounded by Mo'roccan swirls even Al-Allakim Brian Jones might approve and the whole situation remiinds me of thees two girls *kept* giving me a ride when I was hitching to school and even though this was common enough in '72 or rather *because* it was so taken for granted, started to bother me especially that they would just like that pick up someone with my horsehair and finally I mentioned this and strawberry blonde Bonnie says "Oh, we're ready!" and shows me how this six-shooter is stashed under Mary Tyler-looking Sue's driver's seat. So maybe SheDaisy's ditto as they follow hunks on Hondas off road to a carnival nestled in the arroyos and that's when they meet the buff dwarf fire eater.(Speaking of horsehair.)
¶ 2/11/2024 0 comments
